This weekend was great. Caught up with my cousin Nino again--this time he and the family got stranded randomly in Emeryville after leaving their youngest at UC Berkeley to begin the undergrad life (ahhh, those were the best dayz). Saturday night my sister and I decided to take Nino and his older sister, Aileen, out to the City. Met up the V-man and his two barcadas. Surprsingly, we all had a great time even though half of us just met each other for the first time. A little hef and mojito at Gordon Biersch. Let me just say, the Hyatt elevator to the Equinox is just as fun as a ride on Great America--edge your toes to the glass, look straight down and pretend that you are being pulled up and down by THE FORCE.

The question I get asked most at age 24 is: why don't you have a bf?
Damn it, this question. I try to find creative ways to answer it:

umm, haven't met mr. right

my focus is elsewhere

the feelings are never mutual

can i just combine all of my guy friends into one??

i'm allergic? grrrr

can he support my shopping habit?

why why why...

Is that what life is about...??

I'd like to think not, but for some reason this is the question (especially amongst my elders). Since when was I allowed to have a bf? I am stuck in my middle school and high school days when lying about all that stuff was second nature. but anyways, i digress.

Really, it is frustrating. It's not one of those things in life you can will to happen. That you have control over. We recite all the things we'd like in that significant other -- but to me in the end it doesn't seem to matter because it's the way he makes you feel. If he really turns you on. If he knocks you off your feet. And makes you feel your lonely days are gone.

(thank you MJ)

And no one can predict who can do that to you. I just live life. Maybe I shouldn't do it so passively. Better yet, maybe I still haven't accepted the fact that I can't really CHOOSE them to feel for me. I know, just have fun with it Divo. have fun. woo-wee! (sense the sarcasm). =) i'm not cynical, i swear =p

Because despite all this venting, I still have the F-word in my brain: FAITH. And I think Faith brings slightly better odds than random chance.

Anyways, i'm totally off to sleep. gnite.